Blood Mixed With Shaving Cream

Rain drops hit the pavement, leaving pools of water on the sidewalk and rivers in the rain gutters, Dmitri held his jacket over his head as he ran through the streets, breaking up puddles that were forming. He held a cigarette in his teeth as he continued to run, his eyes darted between the buildings looking for an awning. He sometimes caught a glimpse of his reflection in the windows, walking calmly besides himself..
“Shit. Shit. Shit.” He repeated over and over to himself, his feet and pants soaked, the small black box dug against his thigh, the question he left unasked burrowed in his mind. He slowed down and walked a few steps, then turned around. “I forgot my medication!” He gasped loudly. He had a small bottle left in his locker at work, and he left without taking it with him. The few left out in the rain gawked at the spectacle, before their heads turned away. “I knew I should have went back to work, I shoulda finished the day, not go to the damn pawn shop and ne-negotiate.” He sniffled, wiping the snot oozing from his nose, his teeth chattered. . 
Not go home early and unexpected? What a surprise for her. Whispered through the air. Dmitri turned his head, blinking. His shoulders shrugged and continued walking.
“Irene, Irene, Irene. Why did you sleep with him?” His voice became more desperate as he asked himself, cursing every step. “. I was suppose to be working and you looking at...” He became silent. and stepped beneath a large canopy, the sound of the rain on the canopy was like tiny bombshells. He looked down at his feet, the floor, the water droplets creating a constant ripple in the ever expanding lakes of the sidewalks. Anything, anything to grab his attention. The men at the shipyard who gave a holler and a laugh at a crude joke, the hooker and the Rabi or something. He was too busy that day thinking of the ring. The ring, a small crystal, he had been saving money for months, forgoing drinks with his crew members for overtime.
Look at what you did for her, and she threw it back at your face. It spoke, louder.
“Why Dmitri, why did you have to hit her.” He said to himself loudly, as he walked back and forth under the cover. “That’s… unforgivable, even... if-.” He brpke it off. “How is she gonna marry you now, eh?” He continued to monologue, “Hell, I’d be lucky if she even let me back in the house.”
I can help you. Echoed, over and over. A laughter erupted, Dmitri’s neck turned, no one was around, he strained to listen. Silence. He smelled an overpowering cologne, the cheap kind that could make a dog faint from its ranking smell. Loneliness and emptiness. No broken glass to signify a broken bottle, no nothing.
A rapid movement caused Dmitri to look up, his breathe visible in a cloud of white smoke, the cigarette he never lit dropped on the floor and soaked in the water. A black shadow stared at him, its body jet black and the longer Dmitri stared, the thicker and larger it became, expanding and contracting, breathing. Its body dripped jet black ooze and bright red balls of light disappeared and reappeared, blinking. A wide, teeth baring smile appeared from the dark goo, a face and neck extended and leaned forward, inches away from Dmitri’s face.
“What.” Dmitri said, the only word he could think of, no scream, no curse words, just… what.
“I can help. You’ve been calling for my help for quite some time. Dmitri.” Its breathe reeked of dead animals, rotting corpses, left out in the summer heat, caught between the ships exterior, the salt preserved its body, Dmitri knew that smell, it filled his nose every time he cleaned ships, seaweed, dead fish, and dead animals.
“No. I would know if I called for you and I’m sure I didn’t.” Dmitri paused. “I didn’t.” He repeated.
“You need help.” The blob insisted. A long red tongue was visible behind the yellow teeth.
“And what help can you provide, huh?” Dmitri snapped, “Can you turn back time? Can you make Irene more faithful?” His teeth gritted and he dug his fingernails into the palms of his hands.
The blob spoke in a quiet, whispering voice, “I can make you stronger, less impulsive, I can make you a better man.”
Dmitri remained quiet, “Why?” He looked at the blob, his hands shifted, he rubbed the back of his hand, grabbing a small cloth bracelet and rubbing the charm.
“Because-“ The creature hesitated, it’s arms flung out and grabbed Dmitri’s shoulders pushing him towards the wall, “You need help, Dmitri, you called me, Dmitri, I am going to help you. I am going to help you whether you want it or not Dmitri.” Dmitri’s mouth stood wide as he stared at the shadow. “You shouldn’t question those who help you, Dmitri.” The shadow slowly pushed itself into Dmitri, the edges slowly spread out like flames of a fire, grabbing onto his body, clung to him tighter than the wet clothes.
“No! Stop! Get the fuck off!” Dmitri gasped his arms flung, trying to rip the shadows off of him, they wrapped and tied his arms to his sides. The goo pushed its way into his mouth, and Dmitri choked on the soft gooey darkness. The rain seemed to lighten up, soft sprinkling from the sky.
“Don’t… shh…” The blob whispered as it engulfed itself in Dmitri’s body. His body twitched and fought, then relaxed and he stood still.
Dmitri gasped and stared around, the blob had disappeared. The anger and fear he felt no longer lingered in his mind. Let’s go home. His feet moved, each step methodical, he looked at his hand, black goo spread through his skin like black ink dropped in water. Keep going. As Dmitri walked out of the canopy, he no longer felt water touch his body, the clouds were softer, lighter, a faint rainbow. Dmitri looked back at his hand, completely blackened with shadows, his body gave a shudder.
“I can’t stay out in public like this!” Dmitri screamed “I can barely move on my own! Stop controlling me!” A lone woman looked at him, eyes wide. Dmitri studied her, stepping towards her, shoulders broad, fist clenched, breathing heavily, “I’m a monster.” He whispered. His fist was clenched and his nails dug deep within his palm. Monster, monster, monster.
The woman stared at him. “What?” She cowered and stepped back. She smelled like fresh cut flowers, but her makeup was smeared, the buttons on her blouse were one off, her eyes looked doughy and innocent, but her heels suggested something else entirely.
Dmitri’s eyes had a soft, reminiscent look, before they flashed anger, “Whore!” He screamed loudly.
The woman took another step backwards, she turned on her heel and was about to run when the black tentacles ripped out of his arms and grabbed the woman, grabbing her neck and choking, the black gradually filled her entire body, and within seconds she had disappeared completely. Dmitri gasped and stepped back, he looked around, did I really just murder a woman, like that? He thought to himself.
You didn’t murder, I murdered.
‘But no one can see you.’ Dmitri thought to himself, ‘Why did you murder her?’
Could I help myself to such a beautiful specimen? She was far too gorgeous for this life.
Dmitri stepped over the space where the body once was, and his feet took off, Dmitri felt them running mechanically. ‘What do I call you?’
My name is Dmitri, just like yours.
Dmitri attempted to stop his legs from moving, but they continued on, regardless. ‘You’re suppose to help me control my anger, look at what you’ve done!’
Let’s not stop and discuss this Dmitri, we should be going home. Home. Irene. Home.
Dmitri whimpered as his legs rushed up the steps to the apartment. He slid off his coat and dropped it on the floor besides the door, running to the bedroom. Irene laid sprawled on the bed, like a puppet left by itself.
How hard did you hit this woman?
Dmitri watched her, ‘She just… she sleeps most of the day anyway.’
That’s good Dmitri, now to the kitchen.
Dmitri put no struggle as his legs stepped to the kitchen, he grabbed dried spaghetti noodles from the cupboard and set up a pot with boiling water, his hands moved swiftly through the refrigerator as he pulled out the tomato sauce. He set up a sauce pan and poured the sauce in, letting it simmer. Shadows moved alongside with him as he set the table with the nice china dishes and the candles from the bathroom, down to their last quarter of wax. His hands hovered over the table, remembering the first dinner they had together. His grabbed the matches and lit the candles, staring at the flame. His legs felt a heaviness and his buckled, he grabbed the chair for support and stood straight once again, his hand grabbed his wrist and adjusted the charm, continuing to stare at the flame. The smell of the tomato sauce as it mixed with the herbs, the vanilla candles scent wavered through the air. Dmitri set the table and waited patiently, food and coffee always woke her up. The bed creak as Irene rolled off, he pretended not to notice, straining the spaghetti and setting on the China plates, pouring tomato sauce over the noodles. Her feet dragged to the kitchen, groggy, and when she stepped in the kitchen she looked at Dmitri. Her eyes laid on him, the sleepy, dull expression on her face shifted, her eyes widened and she stepped back.
“What are you doing back here?” She screamed.
Dmitri held his arms out, “Forgive me. I screwed up.”
She slapped his hands away and pushed his chest away, “No, no! Never in a million years!” She stared at him, her arms held up defensively.
Anger swelled in Dmitri, his heart beat rapid. Keep calm.
“I made your favorite, my love.” Dmitri forced into a whisper, softly kissing her forehead. “Never again, never will I hurt you.”
She whimpered, her body leaned in his, “Dmitri…” She stared at him, how, he wondered, how could fear and love exist in the same person at the same time?
“I will never hit you again.” Dmitri assured, he reached for her arm and she flinched, staring up at him. “Never.” He repeated, softly. He coaxed her to the table and pulled her seat out.
“Dmitri, love, if we could eat tomorrow, I have no appetite.” Her eyes laid on Dmitri, her mouth slightly open. She watched for the opening sign.
Dmitri stared at the table, the candle, nearly out of wax, the food no longer steaming hot, the little black box he had set in the freezer, so he could pull out dessert with that alongside it, the corner of his mouth twitched, “I’ll wrap plastic over the top.” He looked at her, then at the plates.
“Oh thank you my love.” Irene said, standing up and placing her arms around his neck, Dmitri stared off in the distance, the shadows in the wall twisted and contorted, a faint screeching laugh in the distance. “Honey you have red on your shirt.” Irene’s voice grew higher pitched. There was a brief pause.
“Tomato sauce, love. Tomato sauce. We’ll just throw it in the wash with club soda.” He smirked.


Dmitri and Irene laid in bed, curled together, Dmitri staring at the wall opposite of them. “Are we over?” He asked, his eyes watching the still shadows the lamp and dresser made against the wall.
Irene stared at him, “Honey we’re… so far from over.” She kissed his neck softly and smiled.
No, no, you still need help. So much work to do, my dear child, so very much.
“I didn’t know you could be so… delicate.” Irene kissed his shoulder, Dmitri felt her chapped lips gently peck his collar bones, the shadow slowly moved across the wall. Their slowed breathing was the only sound in the room, Irene gazed at Dmitri, his chest rising and falling as he breathed in and out, his eyes half closed. His gaze left the wall and focused on her, the swirling darkness disappeared, as Dmitri stared at Irene, he breathed in the faint floral smell, and her smell, a sweet honey-like smell. He remembered the woman, the fear in her eyes as Dmitri approached her and the shadows grabbed her, he hid his wince and looked back at her.
“Marry me, please, make me the happiest man in the world.” He whispered in her ear, he felt the need to do it before the shadow creature told him to. Her eyes lit like fireworks, her smile, wide.
“Yes! Yes! Yes!” She burst out, “Oh my god, yes!” She fell to her knees and kissed Dmitri, gave another cry of yes, her lips ran up his neck, kissing, until it reached his lips. She enveloped his lips, gently tugging them with every kiss. Her nails clawed in his back, “Yes.” She repeated one final time.
Dmitri closed his eyes and smiled. “I’m glad.” His eyes scanned her face, “It’s in the freezer, near the ice cream. The engagement ring.” He chuckled, “I would love to get it for you, but being here is more important.”
She kissed his cheek, “I can get it tomorrow.” She answered, laying her head on his chest.
“Good night, my wife, my love, my everything.” Dmitri felt the swirling darkness and flashing white sparks as he closed his eyes, a shrill cackle, and the sound of a woman screaming.


How does it feel to be a married man?
Dmitri looked around his bedroom, the sunlight bled in through the blinds.
“What happened?” Dmitri looked around, “Why aren’t I in a cell?”
Why would you be?
“I just had a feeling I would.” Dmitri mused.
“Honey are you up?” Irene’s voice chimed through the apartment.
“Hold on lovebug, I need to do my morning routine.” Dmitri pulled himself out of bed and dragged his feet to the bathroom, he let the water run in the sink. He stared at his reflection, dark circles laid beneath his eyes, the reflection stared back at him with a haughty disgust.
“Is it okay if I heat up the spaghetti?” Her voice rang through the apartment, an angelic choir.
“It’s fine dear.” Dmitri washed his face with water and poured the foam shaving cream in his hand, slowly patting it on his stubble.
“Honey are you shaving?” Irene walked into the bathroom, “You don’t work today, remember? You never shave on your off days.” She looked at him, slightly worried.
Dmitri blinked and smiled, “Of course.” He pulled the razor out from the bathroom cabinet, the orange case of pills right next to it. “I shouldn’t waste the cream though.” He gently tugged it down, the cream disappearing, leaving clean, soft, skin. “I also want to look my cleanest, we’re going out tonight.”
Irene squealed and smiled, “Let me know when you’re done shaving, so I can kiss you!” She giggled loudly and walked out the bathroom to the kitchen. “Where are we going?”
Dmitri stared at the mirror, the shadow raised through his body, his eyes turned yellow and his teeth grew sharp. The razor slipped and nicked his cheek, the blood mixed with the shaving cream. He screamed loudly and Irene cried out.
“Dmitri are you okay?” She ran through the kitchen and into the bedroom.
He looked at her, “I’m a monster.” He whispered. The shadows inched towards her on the door frame, just out of reach of grabbing her.
“Honey you look fine, it’s just a small scratch.” Irene smiled, wiping the white foam from his cheek. She kissed the newly shaven side. “I’m almost done with breakfast.” She whispered in his ear.
“How long does it take for you to reheat spaghetti?” Dmitri laughed. He stared at her, she was wearing his old sweatshirt, it hung limp against her, too many sizes too big.
“I’m adding stuff, you’ll see.” She turned and walked out. “Don’t forget your medication.”
Dmitri looked at the cabinet, “Yes hon.”
You don’t need medication. You have me. Dmitri stared at his reflection and finished shaving.
“Honey?” Irene called.
“Yes lovebug?” Dmitri answered.
“There is a pair of cops here to see you.”
The black shadows twisted and contorted, every fiber in his body told him to run, he stepped back, tripping on the laundry hamper, “A pair of cops?” He repeated. I thought I smelled bacon.
“Excuse me, Dmitri Perrolon, there was a reported suspicious man running around with your description in this neighborhood.” One of the cops called out, he sounded young, straight from the academy.
“We’ll I be sure to call if I see a suspicious man who looks like me.” He stepped out of the bathroom and smiled. The one who called out looked young, his hair was buzzed, his outfit crisp, the do-good smile on his lips.
We aren’t going to antagonize them.
“Would you please come with us?” The other cop requested, fatter, rounder, unshaven. He smelt of greasy hamburger, with too much onion stuck between the burger and the bun, and a hot dog with sauerkraut and more onions chopped between them, washed down with the health conscience diet cola.
“I would rather eat breakfast with my lovely wife.” Dmitri replied.
Both cops eyes narrowed. “You know, Mr. Perrolon, when people deny our request, usually they are hiding something.” The older one sneered. A cynic, far too old for this job and for this low level task.
Irene stepped in front of Dmitri, “He’s probably tired, he’ll go with you, he just needs to take his medication.” She eyed Dmitri, “He’s… impatient in the morning.” She smiled and waved, the engagement ring on her finger. “It’ll be for a brief moment dear. You’ll probably be back for dinner.”
The cops looked at Irene, “You must understand how suspicious this looks.”
“I understand.” She turned to Dmitri and grabbed his hands, “My love, please go with these cops.” She smiled, “I’ll be here when you get back.” A wink and another giggle.
Dmitri’s lips curled into a smile, “Yes, lovebug.” He walked to the cops, “Do I need handcuffs?”
“Do you?” The fat cop grunted.
Dmitri remained silent and walked past the two, they followed behind him.
“Goodbye my love.” Irene called from the apartment door, smiling.
Dmitri stepped into the cop car and sat down, the cops followed and sat in the front.
“Now we didn’t say this in front of the wife, Perrolon, but we have a witness.” The younger one said.
“Must be a case of mistaken identity.” Dmitri retorted.
“No, no. Your victim is still alive. You left her on the street.” The greasy pig sneered.
Dmitri tilted his head, “That’s not possible, I never attacked anyone.”
“She saw where you live. She followed you home.” The chubby bastard turned and faced Dmitri.
Don’t. Don’t. Don’t.
“I didn’t touch her, the shadows did.” Dmitri’s voice felt shaky.
Both the cops stared at him, “The shadows?” The younger asked. It sounded like a gang. The shadows.
Dmitri held out his arm, shadows flew around the car, through the fence that separated the cops from the backseat. “See? The shadows!” Dmitri cried. “Don’t you see?” His voice became more desperate.
Both cops stared, stone faced. “If you’re done playing, we’re going to question you now.” The false sincerity of the fat cop made the shadows wider, crazier.
Dmitri stared, “Stop ignoring them!” The shadows groped, grasping nothing. He cried loudly. “Stop it!”
The cops turned around and the greasy pig turned the ignition, driving toward the station. Dmitri leaned against the seat, the shadows slinked back into his skin, he glimpsed and saw his reflection in the top mirror. A giggling shadow winked.


“So, you take pills for… what exactly?” The older cop walked around the table and chairs. The walls were a grey color, paint chipped in some places. The shadows slowly crawled about, searching.
“Headaches.” Dmitri answered.
That’s right Dmitri, short answers.
“And what happens when you don’t take the pills?” The older cop asked. His suit wasn’t tucked, chest hair stuck out of the top of his shirt.
“Headaches.” Dmitri repeated. He looked at the younger cop who watched his companion closely.
“You don’t…” His eyes rolled, “Get angry and violently attack anyone who even speaks to you?” His shoulders shrugged, “Something like that maybe?”
“Wouldn’t dream of it, sir.” Dmitri answered, staring at his reflection, his mouth movements, the corner of his mouth as he smiled, seemingly innocent, yet all Dmitri could think of was knocking out the fat cop with one shadow, pounding his grease covered, unshaven face into oblivion, while another shadow whipped around and choked the younger cop. The reflection he was looking at didn’t show those evil thoughts running through his mind, it was completely separate, a different world, the reflection was a different person than he. A sudden searing pain brought him to reality, his nails dug into the palm of his hand.
“Well?” The older cop asked.
Dmitri coughed and looked away, “What was the question again? I was lost in thought.”
“What is the medication you take?”
“Ris-ris-“ Shadows rose from the walls as Dmitri attempted to answer. “Risper-something or other.” Dmitri’s tongue tied itself, his eyes looked around the room, they swallowed the grey and the walls became black.
“Risperidone.” The younger cop chimed in.
“And what do you treat with riiii-riii-risperidone?” The older cop sneered at Dmitri as he paced around the room. The younger cop watched him, his mouth opened.
“Headaches. Haven’t you already asked this?” Dmitri’s voice had an exasperated tone. “I could swear I’ve answered you so many times, I get really bad headaches and I can’t do nothing all day but lay in bed, I need Risperidone for headaches and if you can’t understand me then please, just leave me be or charge me! I’m tired of being pushed around by you because you have a badge and authority!” He stood up, his finger pointed at the cop.
“Do you have issues with authority?” The older cop walked to the table and smiled at Dmitri with a smug sense of superiority. His teeth grew sharp and yellow as Dmitri continued to stare.
Dmitri gave a weak smile and a nervous laugh, “I just- I just want to get home to my wife.” He answered, sitting back down. He cleared his throat, “Back to my wife.”
The older cop stepped back and grunted, “We already got you for the attack.” He answered, “And you aren’t getting off with some psych defense mumbo jumbo, you hurt that woman in furious anger and you’re going to pay time for it. Just admit you’re guilty and we’re done.”
The swirling shadows wrapped around Dmitri, “I’m not guilty.” He whispered.
“What was that?” The older cop asked. “I’m hard of hearing.” He glared at the young cop and there was momentarily silence in the room.
Just admit you’re guilty to the bastard.
“I’m guilty, okay? I-I didn’t mean to, but I hit that woman!” Dmitri stumbled on his words.
“Choked.” The young cop corrected.
Don’t mess around, just admit to it!
“You can’t remember your own crime?” The older cop growled.
Dmitri gave another loud scream and grabbed his head, “Choked! I choked that woman! I left her on the cement while I ran home! Just sentence me and get it over with!”
The younger cop remained quiet, “Let’s go to lock-up for the night.”
“I’ll take the plea bargain, whatever paper work I gotta sign to go to jail.” Dmitri answered quickly.
Both cops looked at him, “We’ll get this settled tomorrow.” They answered, helping Dmitri stand up. Dmitri watched the shadows envelop the world around him, men’s faces turned to brightly colored masks, as they stepped through to the jail cells, the bright orange jumpsuits of the other cellies where fluorescent against the black background, the shadows licked their outfits, their faces, hideous, laughter erupted and wolf whistles distorted as Dmitri stepped into his cell, he smelled the rank smell of piss and shit, the very same words he would describe his mood. His cellmate looked at him, Dmitri couldn’t make out his face beneath the shadowy coverage. A screeching cry pierced through, Dmitri felt the sudden urge to rip out his ears, his nails dug into his palms, the same pain that ran through his body as he stood frigid in the cell.
“Are you okay?” The words indistinct, sounding like his cellmate was underwater and not five feet away. Dmitri gave a dry heave, he felt himself gasp for air, yet he couldn’t breathe, he felt his legs collapse under his own weight. The gargled voices and the smell of urine faded, as blackness overcame Dmitri’s body, numbness, Goodbye, echoed in his mind, until everything had completely ceased to exist. His body twitched.


Dmitri blinked his eyes open and he stared at the judge from the defendant chair.“Dmitri Perrolon, you are hereby charged Not Guilty, with reason of mental disease or defect, however…” The judge paused, “You are to serve time for your crime in a mental facility, until it is deemed you are fit for society once more.” He banged on the gavel and Dmitri stood up, bowing his head, he turned and looked at the seats in the stands, the psychologist who spoke on his behalf and the two cops sat, watching, the woman he attacked sat on the defendant seat, all sympathetic towards him, but no Irene, she sold the ring for the lawyer. He followed the bailiff to the jail cells, keeping his head low, his thumb rubbed his wrist, where his bracelet was once tied.